Blog Posts from "Big Boys make Big Boy noise." - Gameriot.com

Aion has been great so far but NCsoft is about to lose every Oceanic player

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Fri, 09 Oct 2009 22:01:43 -0400

Aion has been really good so far. The server stability has continued (even through sieges), and although the end-game is a bit more zergy than I would have liked I'm still enjoying it just as much as when I posted my last article (even though leveling is still a bit of a ******* pain, up to level 41 personally).

The only problem is that NCSoft just banned 70% of the proxy services available. This includes LowerPing, Gamepath, Wowtunnels, Smoothping, and I'm sure there's more that I don't even know of. I assume the reason was to quell botters, farmers and spammers who connect through these IPs to mask a global IP ban, however the majority of people who use these IP's are Oceanic based players trying to reduce their latency from 400-800 to 2-300.

I'm going to say it straight up, Aion is unplayable without some form of proxy service. WOW actually wasn't too bad, with the algorithm and decent internet I would normally get around 2-270 ping without any proxy service (and around 140-180 with). Absolutely not ideal, but something you can put up with for battlegrounds, PVE, and low rated arena (lol). Because of Aion's server locations however, with GREAT Internet, Australians will be averaging around 400-450 which considering the game is already not extremely high-ping friendly with its lack of spammable snares and the Z axis (flying) -- good ******* luck actually doing anything but mindlessly tab targeting in fortress sieges.

So. What does this mean for the Oceanic player base? Well right now there is still a couple of IPs working (LowerPing WOW East servers for one -- only around 20-40 more ping than the Aion specific ones), but if more people migrate to them then they'll probably just get banned too. This will honestly snowball into I'd guess around 50% of the Oceanic player base quitting (and 100% of the melee), which would further snowball into further Oceanic people quitting because all of their friends / guild are, and then pretty much everyone else since the Oceanic server will be dead and they'll be no one to play with.

Judging by server queues in peak time, I know that there are at least 10000 active Oceanic players (and there's easily a LOT more, but this is minimum going on facts). 10000 subs at $15 a month = $150000 (a month) that NCSoft would be losing if they decide to keep this change just to quell the gold spammers and farmers. I just hope that they realise it really isn't ******* worth it in the next day or 2 before half the Oceanic playerbase ragequit.

look at what a gentlemanly scholar buddhist is

no.spam@gameriot.com (NoblemanPyrrho) — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 16:20:13 -0400

lhttp://mortalseraphim.xanga.com/profile/

http://mortalseraphim.xanga.com/

look out, socrates! there's a new philosopher on da block!

Starting from the beginning; there is no need to live. This means there is no need for anything that sustains your life. There are, however, human, physical preferences. Humans naturally have a preference, for example, to eat. Because of the fact that you have no needs, you should just live based on your preferences. I'll call this plan for life "Style P".

In order to have a perfectly logical thought, you must be void of all desire. Desire, preference, keeps you from making a clean thought. In order to reach this perfect thought, which I will call "Final Enlightenment", you must rid yourself of desire. In order to rid yourself of desire, you must have the desire to do so. This makes it seem impossible, but because you are human, you have a way around this. Once you have rid yourself of all desire, except the desire to rid yourself of desire, you've reached Enlightenment. You do still have, though, one desire(the desire to rid yourself of this last desire). This is where humanity comes into play. As a human, you value certain things over enlightenment, because of evolution. Through your life, you can rid yourself of these evolutionary desires. In order to reach Final Enlightenment, though, you will realize they are very useful. Once you are about to die, you will naturally forget all that is unimportant to you, only remembering the things that you naturally find most important (most likely the desire to live). Because of the fact that you've trained yourself to not have these desires, just before death, you'll have no desire what so ever. You will then die, and you will have achieved Final Enlightenment.

Because of the fact that in the logical Style P life, you live off of preferences, you would most likely prefer to reach Final Enlightenment. You will follow Style P until you have no preferences but the one to be Enlightened. Once you are about to die, you'll reach Final Enlightenment as was shown above. Because a Style P life is a logical one (you realize you've no need for anything, you just do what you prefer), and the path of Final Enlightenment is preferable, the only logical course to take in life is Style P into Final Enlightenment. This means that the meaning to life must logically be to reach Final Enlightenment through Style P.

There is, however, the point that in order to achieve Final Enlightenment, you must be living, and to be living, you need things like food. This would seem to stop the theory from the beginning, but things like food are not a necessity. Through the path to Enlightenment, many have been able to fully self sustain themselves by controlling energy itself. It is most often called Qi, Chi, or Ki. Of course this is theoretical, but logical as well.

All matter in the universe is energy (String Theory), and because the entire universe is one mass (even space is filled with dark matter), you are one with everything. The entire universe is what you are, you just control and observe from what you would call your own body directly. It's a matter of perspective. If you realize this well enough, you can control anything physical. To realize your control over your extended self (the rest of the universe), you should follow the path to Enlightenment. By following the Style P path to Enlightenment, you will begin to come to realization.

If you can supply your body with the nutrients that it needs simply through your control of energy(which came about through Style P path to Enlightenment), things like food and other material needs are no longer needs at all. This means that Style P holds up. The meaning to life is to reach Final Enlightenment.

Buddhism, in it's purest form, is exactly what was described above. It is an open path through life that ends in a release of all desire, and perfect thought, Enlightenment. Buddhism now has been warped by a slow decline in the understanding of the process to reach Enlightenment. Hinduism may actually be a broken off version of Buddhism, rather then the other way around. Hinduism has all the characteristics of a Buddhism which has been warped over thousands of years. The idea of god is used to explain things that aren't understood about the process. If Buddhism wasn't recorded until Siddhartha Gautama began to teach it, that would mean gaps could form in the process to Enlightenment, and those gaps would need to be filled with myth.

Aion is actually good

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 10:37:24 -0400

A lot of people have been contacting me by PM / MSN / AIM or even in-game asking me a variety of Aion based questions since it seems to be pretty well known that if there is a new vaguely okay looking MMO (lol Vanguard, LOTRO, Darkfall etc) then I will try it. Since I pretty much got over typing the exact same **** over and over again, and now that I've actually had some experience with the game -- I think you guys all know what it's time for.

Let me just preface this with a couple of things (that I've said in the past but I'll reiterate in case you haven't read every single one of my 106 blogs or my 1500ish comments);

1. Aion is similar to WOW. If you thought otherwise then you're a ******* mongoloid. Seriously. You have swords, you have magic, you run around in third person hitting *****, shooting **** and fixing *****es, leveling sucks, PVP is fun and if you turn with the keyboard then you're ******* ****.

2. New MMO's are fun and if they are vaguely good and you actually have any friends you should try them if you're not doing anything else because it's a lot better than buying the new Batman game which I finished in one Wednesday night in and returned the next day. New MMO's = $50 for a month of pretty solid gameplay, maybe $65 for 2 -- the average console game = $50 for <20 hours of gameplay. Some have okay multiplayer but most don't or you get over it in like a week.

Anyway!

Aion is pretty ******* fun. It's like WOW but different. There are 8 classes which are basically:

Cleric = Holy Paladin
Chanter = Enhancement Shaman
Sorcerer = Mage
Spiritmaster = Warlock
Assassin = Rogue
Ranger = Hunter with no pet
Gladiator = Arms / Fury Warrior
Templar = Prot Warrior / Paladin / Druid -- whatever, they have some cool **** in PVP

Obviously that's not 100% correct but that's pretty much the closest comparisons you can draw.

Aion is cool because the character creator is so vast. Someone else made a blog on this showing how you could make your own races so go check that out. You can be huge or you can be tiny, you can be fat or you can be skinny. It's honestly pretty sweet and definitely the best character creator in an MMO so far. It's cool to actually be able to create a unique character. Speaking of unique characters, check out the character I made for Duckers (although I actually ended up rolling a ******* huge black guy since I'm a Templar, and my entire guild who weren't Templars rolled small so all the ******* noobs will probably target me in zerg PVP -- I can't get you a screenshot since 2 days in I got 72 hour banned for turning our guild cape into a Nazi flag):

In Aion the combat is pretty much WOW-y, except instead of snares (which there are a lot), some classes have speed boosts instead. This is pretty cool because it makes some aspects of combat a bit more fast paced (at least in the movement aspect). There also is no global cooldown, instead actions are clipped by character animation which is interesting but sometimes a bit annoying.

The THREE main ways that Aion is really cool and different to WOW:

1. I haven't really experimented with these much, but basically -- hold forward for more damage, strafe for increased evasion, back pedal for more defense and dodge. There are other **** like you can combo the two (move forwards and side to side) and there's damage / movement penalties etc, but basically it's pretty cool. This especially comes into play in combat with how I commented before that certain combos can be activated of blocks and dodges and **** like that. I haven't PVP'd much as I got banned when I was level 24, but tanking wise I actually enjoyed having to constantly move around - strafe if I wasn't doing anything, back pedal to cause a block to do a block combo then go back to strafing while it was on cooldown etc. It's pretty cool and I can definitely see it being something fun to experiment and master at endgame.

Of course, there is a ton of other really interesting spells that and mechanics that WOW doesn't have like; fear causes the target to run directly away from the caster, "all damage done to X target is transferred to the Templar as long as the target stays within 5 yards for Y seconds", if you're top ranked you can turn yourself into a raid boss and take on 10 people at once, you lose a lot of points if you're high ranked and you get ganked, "while in this stance your block and defense increase by X. This stance ends when you use a skill" etc.

Before I finish let me just say that leveling sucks. There are a lot of quests but once you hit level 25 it's basically just faster to grind (either solo or in instances etc). Of course there's fun world PVP every now and then but basically it is kind of ****. Then again, I ******* hate questing and I actually prefer grinding because I can just watch TV or something -- but yeah, just so you know, get ready to grind.

I also think it's mentioning that aside from the queues (of which I haven't experienced ever) the launch has been the smoothest ever. The servers were up within 5 minutes of the early start launch time, and from the get go (to my ban) I was smooth sailing with 250ms thanks to LowerPing (lol advertising, but seriously, their new Aion servers are amazing :]:]:]). No server crashes, no delays, no nothing. And all the while we were kept updated thanks to Twitter (the only semi-Aion related site that didn't crash 10 minutes before and after launch).

BUT ANYWAY, if you're not a ******* ***** that can't finish anything you start, there's lots of cool **** and it's probably the best MMO since WOW so try it if you're bored unless you're ******* Serennia and you have no friends to play with and probably can't afford the subscription fee anyway.

The Adventures of Manshoon and a couple of random things

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 05:38:14 -0400

Because the image I'm about to post on this blog is around 6000 pixels in height I figure I should get the couple of random things out of the way first so it doesn't stretch the home page and to also give it time to load.

Speaking of having the same guild through AOC / WAR, that actually brings me on to the bulk of this article. The guild I've been playing with on AOC / WAR has gone under a lot of names (Platinum Rydaz, Korean Netcafe Mafia, North Korean Cuddle Squad, probably more) but we were not the only guild going game to game.

There is another (absolutely awful) guild that's been following us called "Zhentil Keep". I won't bore you with the history behind these guys but basically we met them in AOC, they recruit out of trade chat and then claim they're better than our 90% Gladiator (nerd more like) guild and because of this in AOC we would camp them for a good 5-6 hours every night we played and go on their vent under different names to troll them / hear them raging and troll them on the forums etc.

The main target of our attacks was their 45-year-old overweight guild leader called "Manshoon".

Anyway, since we know that they're going to be playing Aion we thought instead of photoshopping pictures of Manshoon's face onto fat people once they start **** talking us, we might as well just do it preemptively. And thus, I present to Gameriot (something that I hope will be entertaining whether you have heard of Manshoon), The Adventures of Manshoon:

- Slappywag (aka worshipping kid)

Why You Should Play Fighting Games

no.spam@gameriot.com (Adiara) — Sat, 15 Aug 2009 03:31:25 -0400

What you've missed on Rant Room #1; Honestly, why haven't we had sex yet?

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 04:55:28 -0400
People who have read a fair few of my blogs have probably heard me or Duckers mention the Arena Junkies Rant Room on multiple occasions (the only other semi-WoW related site that we really frequent, even though neither of us play it anymore). It's a pretty rad community that I know a number of GR posters / HIGH RATED SUPERSTARS are a part of.

That said, the majority of Gameriot has no idea how to access it, let alone having an AJ "Junkie" account with RR access. Because of this and the fact that I'm pretty active over there I thought I would do the occasional blog showing you guys some of the great stuff that you would have missed.

I've done it before, but I don't think I've ever so explicitly mentioned where the content is from (a lot of the times I'll write up some stuff over there and then add to it a bit and make it into a blog over here), so anyway, here is the first of hopefully many if people like it (and if you don't feel free to express your unquenchable rage in the comments and I won't do it again); Things you've missed on Arena Junkies Rant Room.

Let me just preface these saying Snuffie's logs are the longest. Basically they're not really "funny" like Covah's are, but they're more just funny because Snuffie is a complete ******* woman-beating dickhead (but that's why we like him). I also CBF bolding them.

(2:38 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: hey
(2:38 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: honestly why haven't we had sex yet
(2:40 AM) bec: not interested in asian dick
(2:40 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: ow
(2:40 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: that's okay ur an ugly slut anyway
(2:40 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: your ****** is larger than life
(2:40 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: zangieff looking *****

(2:49 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: hey
(2:49 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: why haven't we had sex yet
(2:49 AM) lindabby: excuse me?
(2:49 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: why
(2:49 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: haven't
(2:50 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: we
(2:50 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: had
(2:50 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: sex
(2:50 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: yet
(2:50 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: ?
(2:50 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: learn to read you vietnamese trash
(2:51 AM) lindabby: i kno how to read
(2:51 AM) lindabby: u fken *******!
(2:51 AM) lindabby: bcoz u turned my best frnd on me
(2:51 AM) lindabby: nd went out wif her after we did
(2:51 AM) lindabby: u fukhed!
(2:51 AM) lindabby: im not a slut nd i wnt eva **** you again?
(2:51 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: yes you are lmfao
(2:52 AM) lindabby: wtf
(2:52 AM) lindabby: wtf is ur problem
(2:52 AM) lindabby: uve turned into such a jerk
(2:52 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: i always was a jerk
(2:52 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: i was just nice to you
(2:52 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: because i wanted anika lollll
(2:52 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: you being a virgin was just a bonus
(2:53 AM) lindabby: ur unbelievble
(2:53 AM) lindabby: ths is hw u tlk 2 me after treatin me like ****
(2:53 AM) lindabby: nd after 2 yrs?
(2:53 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: i treated you how you wanted to be treated
(2:53 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: like a SLUT LMFAO
(2:54 AM) lindabby: u shuld watch wat u say
(2:54 AM) lindabby: u talk so much ****
(2:54 AM) lindabby: i should get u smash
(2:54 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: smash?
(2:55 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: stfu fob *****
(2:55 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: what **** do i talk?
(2:55 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: you're a ******* slut
(2:55 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: don't try and deny it
(2:55 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: you're not evne 16 homies be peepin you all the time at bbar and rapture and ****
(2:55 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: popping pills hoping for some guy who has a car to **** you
(2:55 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: you lonely ****in *****
(2:55 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: get a clue
(2:55 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: get a brain
(2:55 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: you're a ****ign SLUT
(2:55 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: and a lousy fish ****
(2:55 AM) lindabby: i hope u get fken smashed
(2:55 AM) lindabby: FUKHED!
(2:55 AM) lindabby: I HATE U
(2:55 AM) lindabby: FUKK U
(2:55 AM) lindabby: FUKFACE
(2:56 AM) lindabby: GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
(2:57 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: i'm sorry i don't know what came over me
(2:57 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: that wasn't me that typed that
(2:57 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: are you catholic?
(2:57 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: the devil possessed me
(2:57 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: and typed that
(2:57 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: he wants you to hate me
(2:57 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: i swear
(2:57 AM) lindabby: FUK U
(2:58 AM) lindabby: FUK OFF
(2:58 AM) lindabby: BLOCKD

(3:03 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: hey u
(3:03 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: honestly why haven't we had sex yet
(3:05 AM) Mi'SHi_: what?
(3:05 AM) Mi'SHi_: because you never asked me?
(3:05 AM) Mi'SHi_: or gave me a chance
(3:05 AM) Mi'SHi_: or whatever?
(3:05 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: wat
(3:06 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: so you're saying
(3:06 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: if i did ask you would?
(3:07 AM) Mi'SHi_: yea maybe if it was like a few years ago
(3:07 AM) Mi'SHi_: but definitely not anymore
(3:07 AM) Mi'SHi_: yuck
(3:08 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: aww why not?
(3:08 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: why before but not now?
(3:08 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: YUCK!? i'm like the cutest guy in the world
(3:08 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: i'm actually going to korea next year to get in training with yg
(3:08 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: i'm preparing to take asia by storm
(3:09 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: PREPARE TO SEE MY MUSIC VIDEOS ON YOUTUBE
(3:10 AM) Mi'SHi_: haha
(3:10 AM) Mi'SHi_: same old peter
(3:10 AM) Mi'SHi_: well... thats one of the reasons i would have (and would still like you but..)
(3:10 AM) Mi'SHi_: you know
(3:11 AM) Mi'SHi_: even though youre
(3:11 AM) Mi'SHi_: funny, charming, smart, cute whatever
(3:11 AM) Mi'SHi_: a bit of a nerd but you take pride in that which is like... yea
(3:11 AM) Mi'SHi_: gross i cant believe im saying this lol
(3:11 AM) Mi'SHi_: you seem like the perfect guy
(3:11 AM) Mi'SHi_: you know yourself you were only friends with me because of xtina
(3:11 AM) Mi'SHi_: so yea...
(3:11 AM) Mi'SHi_: you chose her over me
(3:11 AM) Mi'SHi_: and i would have done anything for you then... just not anymore
(3:12 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: lol
(3:12 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: aw
(3:12 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: i'm flattered
(3:12 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: haha
(3:12 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: WELL
(3:12 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: i'm giving you a chance now!
(3:12 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: *wink*
(3:14 AM) Mi'SHi_: ... No peter.
(3:14 AM) Mi'SHi_: never
(3:14 AM) Mi'SHi_: that was in the past
(3:14 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: why not!?
(3:16 AM) Mi'SHi_: because im not naive anymore
(3:16 AM) Mi'SHi_: and i dont like guys solely becuase they are cute
(3:16 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: are you saying that i don't have personality?
(3:17 AM) Mi'SHi_: you do
(3:17 AM) Mi'SHi_: but honestly, all that happiness and prince charming persona is just a front
(3:17 AM) Mi'SHi_: because under all that playful and nice guy exterior
(3:17 AM) Mi'SHi_: youre just... shallow and ive seen first hand how much of a jerk you can be to girls
(3:18 AM) Mi'SHi_: if they arent pretty enough
(3:18 AM) Mi'SHi_: or if they do ONE thing thats silly or whatever
(3:18 AM) Mi'SHi_: and youre so unforgiving on so many levels yet you do so much **** to people which makes you a hypocrite
(3:18 AM) Mi'SHi_: to be really honest with you... i think you're really insecure
(3:19 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: LMAO
(3:19 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: damn
(3:19 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: i didn't know you were a psychatrist
(3:20 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: all i'm going to say is
(3:20 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: under all that ugly, gross, fat exterior
(3:20 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: theres just...
(3:20 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: more layers
(3:20 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: of fat
(3:20 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: LMFAO
(3:22 AM) Mi'SHi_: wow peter.
(3:22 AM) Mi'SHi_: and i thought we were going to have a decent conversation
(3:22 AM) Mi'SHi_: i guess you really are just an immature jerk
(3:22 AM) Mi'SHi_: obviously GROSS
(3:22 AM) Mi'SHi_: btw... christina told me you were a cheater anyway and you were such a ***** about sex
(3:22 AM) Mi'SHi_: i think theres something wrong with you. what kind of guy rejects sex. maybe youre a closet homo?
(3:22 AM) Mi'SHi_: haha.
(3:23 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: ROFL
(3:23 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: YOU BELIEVE EVERYTHING SHE SAYS?
(3:23 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: LMAO
(3:23 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: SHE TOLD YOU SHE DIDN?T LIKE ME SO SHE WOULDN'T HURT YOUR FEELINGS
(3:23 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: SHE LIED TO HER 'BEST FRIEND'
(3:23 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: SHE PROMISED YOU SHE WOULD NEVER DATE ME HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
(3:23 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: YOU KNOW WE ****** THE SAME DAY SHE TOLD YOU THAT
(3:23 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: I STILL HAVE THE MESSAGE ON MY OLD PHONE I THINK
(3:24 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: SHE CHEATED ON EVERY GUY SHE'S EVER BEEN WITH
(3:24 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: WHY DON'T YOU ASK WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK ABOUT ME CHEATING
(3:24 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: AND I THINK THE WHOLE WORLD KNOWS THAT I HAVE A LOW SEX DRIVE AND I LIKE TO **** LIKE TWICE A WEEK MAX
(3:24 AM) Mi'SHi_: No. you made her the type of person she is today because thats how much you ****** her over
(3:24 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: AND BTW YOU CAN'T MAKE CALLS LIKE GROSS GO LOOK IN THE MIRROR LOL
(3:24 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: ROFL DON'T BLAME ME SHE TURNED OUT THE WAY
(3:24 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: lmfao she was a born slut
(3:25 AM) Mi'SHi_: youre such a ******* little kid
(3:25 AM) Mi'SHi_: get over yourself
(3:25 AM) Mi'SHi_: youre going to be a lonely old man. just like your dad.
(3:25 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: youre going to be a fat disgusting old lady.
(3:25 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: just like rosie o donnel
(3:26 AM) Mi'SHi_: at least i'm completely secure with myself =)
(3:26 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: who wouldn't be with your body fat
(3:26 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: you could survive a nuclear winter
(3:26 AM) Peter | TRANSFOR: holy **** lmfao
(3:27 AM) Mi'SHi_: ... sigh
(3:27 AM) Mi'SHi_: dont ever contact me again.

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I almost killed a guy today, and Duckers loves dicks but not in a gay way + HON / LOL GIVEAWAY OMG

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Sat, 01 Aug 2009 05:00:13 -0400
I almost killed a random New Zealander today (actually). PS: This article will be (although feel free to insult everyone and if it's "good" and you want one, grats);

- Hogan
- Bodi
- Yiska
- Mung
- Kyle
- Slapnuts

Bonus points for combining insults + hope this helps.

hope this helps

Doing stuff ironically

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Fri, 17 Jul 2009 19:31:51 -0400
I realized when I woke up this morning that I really didn't cover this topic as much as I should have in my last blog, and since Kyle forbid me from doing a follow up "drug encouragement" blog I figured that an expansion on the topic of doing stuff ironically would suffice. I'm sure everyone has seen an example of someone "doing something ironically" before, but what you may not be aware of is that you can pretty much do anything in life ironically. Lets start with the basics.

"Irony (from the Ancient Greek

All the time. Seriously, name something you can do and I'll tell you how you can make it ironic. In fact, another great thing about being ironic is sometimes you won't even have to change anything -- all you need to do is tell people that you're being ironic. Don't jump right into dressing up like a childrens book character though, a good starting point are glasses. There are a couple of glasses you can start wearing ironically that will begin to set the foundation for your new and more ironic life style. My 2 favorites are the extremely nerdy glasses (seen in the Harry Potter Boonie picture), but the other is the Kanye West shutter glasses.

To be honest though any accessories should work. From a ninja turtle watch to a Spice Girls backpack, just go with what feels right. Actually, t-shirts that say ironic and hilarious things on them like "People who buy joke T-Shirts are lame" would be great too, and if you can't find any feel free to make your own. Here are some examples where being ironic will help you.

All your clothes are dirty and you have nothing good to wear? Wear a really obscure outfit (this can range from pink colors to old gay Dragon Ball Z t-shirts that still kind of fit) ironically.

You have a bad pimple that you don't want people to see? Go to the store and get a Hello Kitty pink bandaid to put over it ironically.

You really don't like the taste of beer but your friends will tease you if you get a rum and coke? Get the gayest cocktail on the menu (preferably with something that mentions penises, orgasms, or hot sex) ironically.

A girl asks you for your email but you're still using the one you made in grade 7? Tell her it's a new email which you made ironically.

All your friends are hitting the dance floor but the only dance you can legitimately do is the junior high school waltz? Start dancing as gay and as bad as possible ironically.

You don't have your own car so you borrow your sister's old gay one that has a hot pink interior? Roll down the windows and crank the Venga Boys or Aqua ironically.

Practice basically makes perfect, and in just a few weeks you can make the ultimate transformation into a cooler and more likeable person.

hope this helps

hope this helps

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Tue, 14 Jul 2009 21:29:29 -0400
Every time I've opened up Gameriot in the last month or 2 (aka a total of 3 times) there's been some sort of blog on the front page about picking up women. The blogs were alright, they covered pretty much the basics that most guys should be able to figure out and utilize (be cocky, don't be a nice guy, ignore her, act confident) but I really felt they were lacking the finer points that people like myself have picked up after a long and rocky career (which I was getting around to posting in h2oh[lol]'s blog but I figured I'd just move it here since I had some other stuff to say as well). First up is a tip which Duckers recommended to me;

I haven't been doing much lately on the WoW front. I did some Ulduar and then quit WoW after stealing our guild bank back from our Guild Leader who then spent 2 weeks calling me and trying to sue me before actually going to a lawyer who laughed in his face. Then I insulted some other people and photoshopped some screenshots of a guy in Avast telling me about how much he "loves his daugter". And aside from that I've just been working and doing Uni.

I'll probably play Aion and set up the ol' Aus PVP guild so if anyone's keen just message me when it comes out (no aus servers is gey, probs rolling on w/e the "unofficial" aus server is although I'd like it to be the same as the "BG9" one). Anyway.

Duckers is cool,

hope this helps

Levidian trolls himself for 6 straight hours + Maddlexie picked up by SK Gaming

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Mon, 23 Mar 2009 10:42:30 -0400

Second up, someone sent me this. I actually missed the post but I dug it up on the AJ mod forums and it was pretty ******* funny:

If you don't know who this guy is (I actually didn't), check out his PVP movie which features more backpedaling than the Priest movie I made in S3, and a lot of devour magic ultra-zooms: http://www.arenajunkies.com/showthread.php?t=71914

I actually don't think this was half as funny as it could have been. One of the mods on AJ deleted (well, moved) it before we could really get several pages of hilarious comments, climaxing in someone from SK posting "umm, no you aren't". Ah, **** that would have been good.

Still, if you're at all interested here's the voice recording of the set up. It's pretty long but a couple of funny parts: http://files.filefront.com/skmaddwmv/;13514070;/fileinfo.html

JK I'm Blizzard. We're one change away from 1600 Superstars running around in full Deadly.

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Sun, 01 Feb 2009 00:50:26 -0500
Okay, firstly, I don't know how anyone can say that this new system is even remotely good.

It's a piece of ****, and if you like it, so are you (sry jasi).

I know it's been beaten to death, but changing in in the middle of the ******* season? What a complete ******* joke.

I am amazed at Blizzards ability to continually **** on the non-retarded-hippopotamus (NRH's for the purpose of this blog) population, and especially at how most of us seem to lie there and eagerly take it like Estel takes a bi-weekly dicking from an elderly Cuban man.

Pretty much the lowering of Deadly gear, and this new BS system, I'm pretty sure that 1700-1800 teams will reach 2050. Congratations Blizzard you've finally made it so anyone can "succeed" in arena.

Oh, and stop ******* using the word "casual". Just say bad. Because I'm pretty ******* sure you can play 30 games a week and hit 2200. In fact, find me an arena player who even logs onto this **** game outside of a couple hours of arena, or PVE raiding (because Ulduar is probably going to be harder than 2400) and I'll find you a 9/10 woman who doesn't fight off the urge to vomit when they see me naked.

Slappywag Xfire Streams inc

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Mon, 19 Jan 2009 10:32:50 -0500
When ever I get round to it I'll start streaming some mind-destroyingly-amazing content from the PoV of these badboys:

My Xfire Account is Slappywagz.

Prepare yourselves.

The Hunter Song

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Sat, 17 Jan 2009 00:06:49 -0500
Immediately after posting the Neilyo song on AJ, I got this PM:

"Hi,
I herd your song abouts neilyo ,and I couldnt resist to do a song about Hunters with the same melodies as you uses. But I dont have a skills to make it into a song nor the rating to posted it.

So I thought I sending you the lyrics and you could chose if you want to make it into a song or post the lyrics

You flaring rouges
Like a ghost making posts
Yeah you really know, how to show
Like a pro

And you wears pve
when you know, it's for show
I would know
That your'e dont like resil

You viporr the prost
You silence a sheeps
You scatter the rouge
He's out of control
You flaring a stealths
You think to yourself
Your'e one of a kind
You trinket the blind

You dont reall want to show, yes
But you dont realli want to loose, no

You viporr the prost
You silence a sheeps
You scatter the rouge
He's out of control

I had a crab
to crab the blind
but I missed, so I heard
(and) now I'm CC'd

What a pain
to see
what can I do
when my ping is so so

You viporr the prost
You silence a sheeps
You scatter the rouge
He's out of control
You flaring a stealths
You think to yourself
Your'e one of a kind
You trinket the blind

You dont reall want to show, yes
But you dont really want to loose, no

You viporr the prost
You silence a sheeps
You scatter the rouge
He's out of control

I dont care you're, nerf us
We will come back with classes
That will help us kick *****
aslong as it's not drastic

You flaring rouges
Like a ghost making posts

You vipor the prost
You silence a sheeps
You scatter the rouge
He's out of control
You flaring a stealths
You think to yourself
Your'e one of a kind
You trinket the blind

You vipor the prost
You silence a sheeps
You scatter the rouge
He's out of control
You flaring a stealths
You think to yourself
Your'e one of a kind
You trinket the blind

You dont reall want to show, yes
But you dont really want to loose, no

You vipor the prost
You silence a sheeps
You scatter the rouge
He's out of control
//\\"

So I did.

http://files.filefront.com/huntermp3/;12992410;/fileinfo.html

The Neilyo Song

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Thu, 15 Jan 2009 08:51:18 -0500
I was just listening to Katy Perry's album, thinking about how awesome Neilyo is, and I decided to make a tribute to the guy.

MP3 DOWNLOAD: http://files.filefront.com/theneilyosongmp3/;12980968;/fileinfo.html

I wanted to actually get my brothers band to professionally record it but everyone on vent said my singing enhanced it. Still, I probably will get that done sometime this week.

You change your binds
Like a girl changes clothes
Yeah, you've mastered rogue, like a pro
I would know

And you always think
That CS is real skill
I should know
That you're too good to kill

You're yes and you're no
You're Neil and you're yo
You gouge Hotspot
Garrote and cheapshot
You vanish the blind
You're one of a kind
You blind the AP
And chain some CC

You don't really want to play, no
But you don't really want to quit, oh

You gouge Hotspot
Garrote and cheapshot
You're yes and you're no
You're Neil and you're yo

We used to do
3v3 with SK Gaming
Now you only 3s when you have
A paladin

You've never kissed
Or been kissed so I've heard
But don't fret
Just because you're some lonely nerd

You're yes and you're no
You're Neil and you're yo
You gouge Hotspot
Garrote and cheapshot
You vanish the blind
You're one of a kind
You blind the AP
And chain some CC

You don't really want to play, no
But you don't really want to quit, oh

You gouge Hotspot
Garrote and cheapshot
You're yes and you're no
You're Neil and you're yo

I don't care you wear glasses
As long as you keep kicking *****
Just keep putting up the good fight
Don't roll a death knight

You change your binds
Like a girl changes clothes

You're yes and you're no
You're Neil and you're yo
You gouge Hotspot
Garrote and cheapshot
You vanish the blind
You're one of a kind
You blind the AP
And chain some CC

You're yes and you're no
You're Neil and you're yo
You gouge Hotspot
Garrote and cheapshot
You vanish the blind
You're one of a kind
You blind the AP
And chain some CC

You don't really want to play, no
But you don't really want to quit, oh

You gouge Hotspot
Garrote and cheapshot
You're yes and you're no
You're Neil and you're yo

Slappywag 2100+ WOTLK PVP movie

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Mon, 12 Jan 2009 11:38:59 -0500
http://www.warcraftmovies.com/movieview.php?id=98555

"Hi guys.

This is my 4th PVP movie, and my first WOTLK one, and as usual I hope you enjoy it and please rate and give feedback =D

This PVP movie primarily focuses on my Mage, mainly the 3v3 bracket. I originally wanted to make my first WOTLK movie a Priest movie, and after holding top 3 in 5s for 3 weeks, I was ready to get some footage -- however this week our DK ragequit the game and then so did our Shaman so I had to get Mage clips instead.

Still, I put some non-arena Priest clips in as well just showcasing my various skills in the second half. I hope that you will enjoy it and maybe even learn a thing or two from watching =))))

Shoutout to Lickerzz and Helldridge from the first arena clip, and SK-Gaming for their continued sponsorship and support. "

Blizzard developers have amnesia, and Ring of Valor should and will be removed

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Sat, 27 Dec 2008 22:14:19 -0500
When evaluating the PVP in WOTLK it seems likely to imagine that all of the Blizzard developers were in some sort of vehicle collision, and have complete amnesia about everything that occurred in both vanilla WoW and TBC.

In fact, that can probably be the only logical explanation behind some of their design decisions, such as:

- Environmental damage being added into the Ring of Valor, after they tried it in S1 in Nagrand but removed it.

- Removing Mace Stun because RNG is stupid, but then adding in a chance to be able to execute for 14k from 100% health.

- Making an arena without LoS for the first half a minute, when matches are usually decided in that time.

- Scaling damage to a point that rivals the experience of vanilla WoW.

The ****** up part is, the list seriously goes on, but I'm too ******* lazy to list all the reasons that Blizzard is ******* dumb so I'm just going to go on with my original point (which I can't even remember).

Aside from the really obvious points like no ******* LoS (making it a free win for like any ******* Hunter team), the arena itself is actually buggy as ****.

Like 5 times I have been left behind on the floor of the arena while the elevators go up without me. You get teleported up after like 10 seconds, but 10 seconds is way long enough for one of your team members to die without you. What is even worse is that the enemy team can actually target and kill you like you were standing still on the top of the elevator, which I guess can kind of be countered (although you don't get stuff like Anti Magic Zone while down there) but when you first realize you can be targetted and die to 2 AP mages for 28 points, it's pretty ******* balls.

There is a second variation of this that can also work in your favor / against you, where you get stuck in a corner like half way up the shaft (shaft like penis lol) as the elevator is rising, and you can heal people standing on the squares but can't be targetted. It was pretty ******* sweet winning 18 points when this happened to me in 3s while I PI free-casted into my DK and Warrior, but pretty ******* aids when I've lost 20+ points to it as well.

Another thing is the constant DC's. I don't know if people have realized yet, but if you fear people near / on top of the pillars (while they are in the ground) grats on instantly DCing them.

Holy **** I've DC'd like 5 times (before I knew what it was) while trying to kite melee on top of the pillar / being near it for when it was going to raise, and then getting one fear and being booted to log in screen. The fact that this is STILL in the game (AND FEAR STILL ISN'T ******* FIXED FROM VANILLA WOW ARE YOU ******* KIDDING ME) is ******* hilarious, but really not that surprising when you consider that Dark Pact (taking mana from your pet, the Warlock spell) still destealths everyone within 100 yards.

Knowing these things however can make Ring of Valor a free win for our 5v5 when you get pre-gate divine hymn + DCing people near pillars if the match is still going after 30 seconds. Normally I wouldn't condone exploiting (rofl nah I actually would and do all the time) but pretty much the only way to get Blizzard to actually pay attention and fix this **** is to have people know about it. And by fix this **** I mean remove it entirely, since they can't even fix a small known bug with reflective ******* shield, so they are making it only work on yourself until they "rebuild the whole spell" for a future patch.

Enjoy.

You now do 50% less damage, and 25% less healing when engaged in PVP combat

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Wed, 24 Dec 2008 01:01:36 -0500
Another blog that isn't just making fun of people in e-relationships, so plz rember 2 +like.

It's pretty safe to say that Blizzard doesn't have a single person on their payroll who is actually good at WoW -- which means that the likelihood of PVP being fixed any time soon is slim to none.

While reading the near endless amount of complaining (which is completely justified) on Arena Junkies and various WoW forums (the lock forums, in particular), I started thinking, what would you change right now to make Arena actually fun again?

"You now do 50% less damage and 25% less healing when engaged in PVP combat".

Duckers (who is cool btw) originally posted that on AJ and the ****** up part is that would actually be a major improvement. Maybe the numbers might need scaling a bit, like 33% less damage, and 10% less healing, but it's sad that that's a legitimate step in the right direction. I honestly think that they should just add something like this into the game and then fine tune classes, rather than trying to fine tune every class in the game individually.

My suggestion however would be on a similar note, except perhaps make "You now take 40% less damage, and do 15% less healing" a PVP set bonus.

Not only would this fix the outrageous problems with damage in general, but it would also finally remove all the PVE gear issues in arena. Maybe make it a 6 or 8 piece bonus with the honor gear? This way Rogues and Paladins (or anyone who gets huge advantages out of PVP gear) would still be allowed to wear gear which they picked up, however they would be a lot more vulnerable while doing so. And likewise, classes which can benefit from PVE gear who don't have it, would not be majorly gimped.

Adding a set bonus like that would seriously fix almost every complaint I can think of about arena side from the terrain design of Ring of Valor itself.

Believe it!

This is a blog about Priests in Arena

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Fri, 19 Dec 2008 09:08:56 -0500
I actually made this informative so +like it you baby rapists.

Well the mood to write something has hit me yet again, and while normally I try to stick to more general topics of discussion I haven't really had a chance to do anything at all in S5 thus far except play my Priest and experiment with some specs and makeups -- so that's what this blog is going to be about.

At the moment arena is horrible for everyone, I don't really need to cover this but I figure I'd just remind everyone of this fact since it's directly relevant to everything else I'm going to write. Everything about arena is horrible, and DK's, Rogues, Mages and Paladins are less horrible than the rest.

As for Priests, although I wanted to try Shadow I've pretty much given up on it until Blizzard gets its **** fixed (seriously, they're like the only DPS class in the game that can't do ridiculous damage, and their survivability is 2 seconds + the duration of dispersion) I've been forced back to healing to actually be able to buy my deadly offpieces.

At first I messed around with the standard disc spec. Pennance is still amazing (3 ticks in 1.5 seconds, each tick is 3k and has an individual chance to crit which procs aegis, and you get mana back each tick from Rapture, and you can use it to fake), however considering that you can't pennance yourself (not that it would even do much difference if you could with WOTLK damage) going deeper than Rapture / Grace / Aegis is pretty much out the window.

The real spec that pretty much every Priest should go is now 21 points in Holy for Spirit of Redemption.

http://www.wowhead.com/?talent=btIMzhxtMcoicRZfEto00o -- Standard PS / PI / SoR spec
http://www.wowhead.com/?talent=btIMzhxtMcoZfEth00oizh -- PI / BR / LW spec (LW is actually good btw)
3rd variation would be down to Guardian Spirit, but tbh I think that's ****.

Quick spec tip before we move on by the way, Blizzard has ninja-nurfed Imp PWS to just increasing the base amount again (aka 3 points for +300 absorbtion at level 80, hell yeah), so don't get that garbage talent. Imp Inner Fire is actually good, and so is Twin Disciples which is currently bugged and actually applies it's bonus to PoH twice (aka, 5 points for 10%).

Spirit of Redemption is pretty ******* good. With the Glyph procs while spamming flash heals / renew / pom I have had it last for up to 35+ seconds.

Considering Priests are actually pretty strong if they are channeling heals into someone, picking up PI for yourself (it's unneccesary for damage), PS for yourself or your team mate, and then going into SoR has actually taken me from being a complete joke healer free-win ****head, to being pretty challenging for 3 DPS and 4 DPS teams in 3s and 5s.

I haven't really had a chance to run any ideal combos that would utilize this, however I can imagine combos like Death Knight / Ret Paladin / Priest being pretty ******* annoying to deal with.

I also think that Priests are one of the best 2 healers for 5s in a 2 healer set up. Paladin and Priest would work amazingly well together with all the gimmicks they have such as Bubble, BoP, Pain Sup and SoR. I can imagine 4 DPS teams with a SoR Priest or Priest Paladin DPS DPS DPS teams being really strong. In fact, **** I want to try Holy Pally / SoR Priest / Ret Pally / DK / Mage or Rogue or Hunter.

On a side note, DK's are so ******* overpowered that if you are struggling as any class you can pretty much just pick up a DK in 2v2 and have an okay combo. I did DK Priest as a joke and although we got farmed like a black man by Paladin Warrior (BOP + Dispel DK's slows + sit on Priest = ah yep... ****** up part is we got the Warrior to 100 health every time. BRB HL CRITTING AND HL CRITTING FOR 20K COMBINED, GO PLANET!) vs 2 DPS and some other healer teams it wasn't too bad.

**** this arena is ****. Although it's pretty cool when this happens (you can heal your team mates as long as they're around the top of the lift):

Also, when you're at the top of the lift and you can see the other team but the actual fencing hasn't opened, you can start casting Divine Hymn and it will go off through the fence, and if the other team isn't piled at the back of the lift, enjoy starting your arena with the entire enemy team CC'd for 8 seconds. ENJOY IT WHILE YOU CAN.

Summary of Season 5 - Day 1

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Tue, 16 Dec 2008 21:25:34 -0500

And I've learned that it's more effective for me as an SPriest in a 5v5 to open with a Silence on a caster, aoe fear bomb and dispersion, than it is to actually do damage to the first person we gib (I've put up SWP and DP about 3 games in a row, and the target has died before my DoTs ticked).

Also, watching a friend 2v2 and as PVE geared Rogue Frost Mage, the Mage pretty much gave up on trying to damage since by the time he could cast something the target was dead.

Calling AP Mage Rogue Rshaman.

How's it going for you?

S5 is going to be more of a joke than 3.0.... and vanilla

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Tue, 16 Dec 2008 07:07:37 -0500
I know this is probably a little old, but I actually hadn't had a chance to look at it until now.

Here is a video. Watch it first and then I'll talk about it.

Okay. I can't actually see what gear the Rogue is wearing, but lets for argument sake say it's full 25 man gear which would be around 3.4kish AP. So, with crit chance and haste and hit etc lets just say that a full Deadly PVP geared Rogue would be doing 20% less damage (it's probably not that much of a reduction, but I'm putting it that low to make a point).

Now, with FULL Deadly gear (5/5, off pieces, gems, everything) you will be peaking at around 900, no more than 950.

So, judging by those figures, it will by no means be out of the ordinary to see a Rogue in PVP gear do 13k damage in 1.25 seconds.

Keep in mind that that's being generous (I don't even think he's wearing full 25 man gear tbh), and Rogues WILL wear PVE gear, and that there isn't a 1v1 arena. Add shatter combos, mind blast deaths (which even don't crit are an easy 7k with DoT ticks), random sudden death executes, ret paladins, DK's, starfires -- whatever. Damage is simply not going to be healable. S5 is going to be more of a joke than 3.0, and tbh, more of a joke than vanilla WoW.

Seriously, in vanilla WoW I could kill people in AP Fireball PoM Pyroblast Fireblast -- now Mages can AP Pyroblast Arcane Barage. In vanilla WoW Rogues killed people in Cheapshot Kidneyshot, now they kill them in Cheapshot (or Ambush Evis as we saw in the video).

The ridiculous amount of damage scaling is going to make arena more luck-based than Mace Stun ever was, and the only thing stopping me from cancelling my account (outside of my horrid addiction and the fact that if I don't play WoW every 5 hours I start seizuring and trying to claw the bugs out of my skin) is that to fix it Blizzard just needs to do some serious scaling.

That and that they haven't reimplemented Mace Stun.

Thank **** the Arena season is beginning tomorrow

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Mon, 15 Dec 2008 20:07:04 -0500
So over maintenance tomorrow the PVP vendors are being put in and we should finally be able to create arena teams and begin S5, and although I'm pretty ******* relieved that I can stop doing loops around obstacles in Dalaran on my mount, I pretty much know that I'm just going to get over it pretty ******* quickly when people start dying within 3 seconds and there is nothing you can do about it.

Seriously, damage is so ******* out of control right now that I don't even think that the 800-900ish resil you get from a full PVP set (yeah, you probably won't hit the cap for like another season or two) is going to make that much of a difference. It's seriously going to be just like 3.0 except maybe a little worse because of all the new spells we have floating around.

Although I was pretty obviously trolling in that interview I posted the other day, I do actually think that comps that are strong verse 2 DPS in 2s are going to get a free ride to high ratings. Druid Mage comes to mind.

Anyway, here's some SS's of the dumb **** I've been doing to pass the time.

But in reality I've spent about 60% of my time doing this (shown to me by Duckers, who is in fact cool):

Interview with me for GladiatorInterviews.com

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Sun, 14 Dec 2008 03:04:55 -0500
I conducted an interview for this new upcoming competitive-WoW based site called "Gladiator Interviews".

You can find the original article here, however, I will copy and paste it here so Slapnuts doesn't rage-delete it.

Tonight I had a chance to sit down with Slappywagzz, Gladiator Priest. He gives us tips on the upcoming season 5, and what strategys he used to pull off a success in arena on the priest class.

Gladiator Interviews: So, let's start Slappywagzz with who you are and how you began to play World of Warcraft.

Slappywagzz: Well I'm an Aboriginal (native, if Americans don't know what that is) Australian player who first picked up the game the Christmas that it was released. I first started on a random PVE server where I raided and didn't really do anything special.

Gladiator Interviews: So what got you into PvP?

Slappywagzz: Once Oceanic tagged servers were released I moved there and actually began to seriously play and made a bit of a name for myself. It was kind of frustrating playing on such high ping due to my location, so I didn't really get into hardcore PVP until TBC was released and along with it various programs that reduced Australians ping from the high 800s to <200.

I always was interested in PVP but didn't really have the will to persue it until it was vaguely fair via latency.

Gladiator Interviews: What comps did you run? What do you feel made these comps so successful? And of course - which is your favorite?

Slappywagzz: Well I actually found it extremely hard to get arena partners for the first two seasons because believe it or not a large number of Australians are actually still racist and they excluded me from their teams because I was Aboriginal.

However, once I actually found people who were wiling to play with me I played the typical Rogue Mage Priest (both on my Priest and Rogue) and Shaman Warrior on my Shaman.

Rogue Mage Priest in Season 3 was my favorite and was pretty much one of the most dominant comps throughout S3 and 4. I found it was really good because Mages can just spam frostbolts and the Priest can spam mana burn while the Rogue can just keep everyone slowed.

Gladiator Interviews: How do you feel Rogue Mage Priest is going to play out in Season 5?

Slappywagzz: Shaman Warrior was my other comp I really enjoyed and I'd say it's probably one of the most skill based comps of TBC.

Slappywagzz: I don't think Rogue Mage Priest is going to be a very good combo because Mages and Rogues are pretty weak at the moment. Priests are probably the best healer in the game right now but I don't think they'll be good enough to carry the other two =\ I think Priest Warlock Warlock would actually be really strong with Warlocks being able to do insane damage with UA and also picking up Soul Link at the same time.

Gladiator Interviews: Playing a warlock priest combo myself I know the kind of synergy you speak of, any plans on possibly a 2s team with a warlock?

Slappywagzz: I think Priest Warlock will again be a really strong combo since it will be able to counter a lot of the teams. It's going to be insanely difficult for any 2 DPS team to kill a Priest with pain surpression, PI, aegis and a Warlock there to CC.

I might actually try it, although I'm shadow at the moment hoping to play double SPriest to counter other 2 DPS (put full dots up, and with dispersion on both DPS it will be hard to kill one of them -- also you have Hymn of Hope which is a different DR to fear so you can rotate DRs)

Gladiator Interviews: Were you happy with the changes to your class in WotLK? Any key changes you would like to speak on that will help improve arena play on the Priest class?

Slappywagzz: I really think Priests are amazingly strong right now. Definately one of the strongest classes if not THE strongest, both Shadow and Disc.

Disc Priests are almost impossible to kill with imp Inner Fire and then all of their instants and Shield talents (their Power Word Shield absorbs an INSANE amounts with talents + they have Aegis). I can tank Rogues until OOM no problem with fear and divine hymn.

Slappywagzz: And Shadow Priests are the same, with dispersion and their mana talents I don't see Shadow Priests as being a viable target at all, which will let them free cast and do crazy damage

Gladiator Interviews: Will you be focusing any drain teams in season 5? Obviously mana burn has been a key spell of the Priest class in the past.

Slappywagzz: Absolutely. I've been reading Arena Junkies and Gameriot and the consensus seems to be that heavy healer teams will be dominating the 5v5 and 3v3 bracket (3 healer 5v5, 2 healer 3v3, etc), which means drain teams would be the perfect counter.

I'm hoping to play a heavy drain comp in 5v5 on my Shadow Priest, and then drain teams in 3v3 when I spec Disc (like I mentioned, Priest Warlock Warlock).

I just wanted to add a little tip I have before I do shoutouts: That is for all large male characters (Male Taurens, Male Orcs, Male Dranaei, etc) to use the paid character customization feature to change to female!

Female characters hit boxes are smaller which means you will be not only harder to target in arena, but harder to hit as well.

Everyone I play with has already made the change, and it really is one of the best things that you can do leading up to the new arena season =)

Gladiator Interviews: Well, we cant wait to see you in season 5, and definitly hope to do another interview with you soon post WotLk! Any shout outs?

Slappywagzz: Shoutouts: Shoutout to all my Aboriginal Gamers firstly! And secondly, just to everyone I play with, that bop went off, team boongtown, WELCOME TO THE SPACE JAM, top dogs, and to my main man Neilyo who I talk to daily about arena and CS and all things computer =)

We thank Slappywagzz for all the useful hints and tips for the priest class, I can't wait to see you in season 5!

Kids are pretty desperate these days

no.spam@gameriot.com (Ducks) — Mon, 01 Dec 2008 22:20:36 -0500
No, this isn't remotely sexual, despite how you may have interpreted the blog title. Well, it kinda is, since it's why I went to the store -- but that's not what this story is all about.

So anyway, 10 PM Saturday night, I'm walking along the footpath to go to the supermarket, passing the bottle shop, and a couple chicks, who're maybe, 15 years old? call out to me and are like "Hey, can you buy us some drinks?" - Obviously I agree, because as some of you know, I have a keen interest in underage girls, and I'm not about to turn down the opportunity to get more of them into drinking.

Now after I asked what they wanted, popping a few suggestions here and there because I am quite fluent in what's hip for the youngsters, one of them was like "Oh, just get whatever, this Jim Beam isn't doing anything."

I take a quick glance and notice that it's the Jim Beam branded BBQ Sauce you get when you order take-away pizza.

I explain to her that it doesn't actually contain any traces of alcohol, it's just advertising for the bourbon etc. So blah blah, took their money, went and got them drinks, took the change and then went back to what I was trying to do before I got caught up in that.

And on the way home, I'm just thinking,

What the **** is wrong with people who are willing to drink an entire bottle of BBQ Sauce, just to get some ******* alcohol?

I know it had none in it, but holy ****, even if it did -- how god damn desperate do you have to be to go to those extents?

Little Big Hurricane Katrina + other uninteresting garbage

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Sun, 09 Nov 2008 11:32:01 -0500
I figured I'd start this off with another awesome LBP level that I've found (note: didn't create):

Little Big Planet is still fun, however because they pretty much deleted all ways to sort levels from original trailers and the beta -- the online is pretty dismal at the moment. It's a shame really, there are so many amazing levels out there, however I'm kind of over having to sift through 200 pages of "Cool Levels" just to find them.

The moderation here has become a complete joke. I can understand my other entries being removed (copy pasting ****, short entries, whatever), but recently Slapnuts (I assume Slapnuts) has just become dumb with it. I don't know if any of you have ever experienced the EX-mod Alphatier on ArenaJunkies but he's pretty much him.

I don't even care about being modded on forums and whatnot, but when Slapnuts completely deletes (aka, I have no back up of the article) a blog that isn't even any worse than the average WoM stuff -- it's a waste of my time. I wouldn't even mind if he PMs me what is wrong with it so I can repost it or whatever but he just deletes it doesn't even tell you why. Ah yep thanks for wasting an hour or two of my life for no reason ****head.

The article he deleted was trolling the balls out of Reconus, yes. But unlike other entries it was actual content. I made pictures, graphs, and wrote it up, and pretty much everyone who read it agreed it was one of the first actually good / lolirl articles I've written in awhile. Not only that but the people who were featured in the article actually didn't even mind and gave me their "permission" (not that I wouldn't have done it anyway) and found it funny. Not that Slapnuts would know any of that with his delete first and not ask any questions and go back to being bald and fat.

Oh and he isn't responding to my PMs about this either so yeah. Great modding idiot.

Anyway, I'm pretty much done with GR unless something changes or I'm insanely bored. Go ahead and spam the comments with "I didn't enjoy reading your stuff anyway" because I pretty much don't even care. That's if this blog even lasts more than 20 mins. Lets find out together.

Darkfall beta 3 days before WOTLK, but does anyone still care?

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Sat, 01 Nov 2008 04:08:03 -0400
Well WOTLK's release is getting even closer (no ******* **** that's how time works) and despite the fact that Blizzard isn't really adding anything new or interesting to the game (unless a bigger and more boring AV is your cup of tea) realistically most of us are going to buy it.

No, that isn't your queue to post some "I'm too cool for WOTLK bro, I quit World of Nerdcraft last year because I'm too busy having a girlfriend and going out with friends but not too busy to go on World of Nerdcraft sites and post about it" comments, but rather mine to reflect on TBC. I mean, despite how much you claim you hated it, TBC did introduce a pretty important gameplay element in the form of arena, and I don't think anyone can say that they haven't had a lot of good experiences either in them or directly resulting from them. And come on... Lake Wintergrasp? That didn't even sound like it would be fun or good like a year ago when it was just one slide in a bad powerpoint.

Okay, so if not WOTLK (lol good joke, we'll all still play it for a year and a half while whining about how bad it is) then what?

I don't know if anyone aside from that one random who posts about Darkfall has been following it, but the Darkfall beta goes live on November 10th (9 days from now), and already I've got people messaging me on MSN / AIM asking me to join their Darkfall guild (yeah I'm ******* popular [and fat]), but I mean.... really?

I'm not disagreeing with the fact that Darkfall looked good like 17 years ago, but does anyone still have high hopes for this game?

On paper, the idea of bringing back the old Ultima Online ruleset sounds extremely appealing to me and I'm sure most of the high end arena players. WoW has always been criticized as being a "carebear" game by Ultima players and 50-year-old bald men who whilst posting on every single MMO forums about how good Shadowbane was forgot that they were never even good at it. On paper, free looting, FFA combat, player housing and all of those goodies sound exactly what I feel WoW is missing.

On paper, a 1900 rated 3v3 is in the top 3% of arena teams.

So yeah, Darkfall does make an impressive MSN pitch (that's where Rangrang convinces me to play X game and to get X people to come with him in his guild called "The no Hotspot club"), but as we saw with Warhammer Online, it takes a lot more than good ideas to make or break a game.

However, if Adventurine (the makers of Darkfall, I just put that in to show that I actually do research for this amazing blog) can actually produce a game that's combat isn't **** (aka; WoW's.... seriously, these games copy WoW's interface, keybindings, and even in-game menus -- why can't they just copy the important bit), then that's a game that I'd still like to try. Oh and just to clarify, within the next 3-4 years.

PS: Pretty obvious that the last 2 months I've just been posting the absolute bare minimum to scrape through with 2nd or 3rd place. I'm hoping to stop degrading myself this month and actually go back to writing content. But **** you, I'm not looking for your approval anyway.

More Little Big Planet stuff, unleash your inner nerd

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Thu, 30 Oct 2008 04:16:32 -0400
Little Big Planet servers have been down more than they have been up since release 2 days ago, but in the brief period I actually got online and through the heavy loading times, the crazy extent that some people are going to go to create their own levels was already apparent.

It comes as no surprise really that when you give people a broad set of tools, they really can make insane stuff (an example of this I noticed a couple of months ago is for the flash game "Fantastic Contraption", where you have like a really small set of rotating / non-rotating objects, and people come up with stuff like this: http://fantasticcontraption.com/?designId=6606), and with the amount of freedom you have on Little Big Planet, we can really expect some insane stuff.

First example of this, is people replicating songs by using "Sound Objects".

If you've never played the game, there are things called "Sound Objects" which can be placed in the world and then activated either by the player coming into range of it, or a "Magnetic Switch" coming into range of it.

Each Sound Object can have 1 sound added to it, and the example I'm going to show you is a piano sound (there is only one piano sound, and then you drag a slider up and down to change the tone). Then when the "Magnetic Switch" on the box is dragged past the sound object, the sound plays.

So without further ado, the first of many pimple-inducing levels:

Little Big Penis, vaguely NSFW

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Mon, 27 Oct 2008 10:48:59 -0400
As some of you may know, there was some controversy in a song that was featured in Little Big Planet which caused Sony to basically recall every single game and delay the game for a week or 2. Apparently there were some lyrics in one of the songs that featured a passage or 2 from the Qur'an, which of course was outrageously offensive even though the song was written and performed by a devout Muslim man.

Anyway, Games Warehouse (where I preodered from) pretty much couldn't be ****** having to discard their stock and wait 2 weeks to get new ones (the official Australian release date is something ridiculous like November 7th) so they just sent theirs out, and as such I've been playing it pretty hardcore since.

Since the Little Big Planet servers aren't up yet, outside of finishing the solo story (and getting 96%+ items collected on every level, of course) I've been messing around with the level create feature.

It's pretty ******* awesome. You literally have all the tools to make levels that the creators had with making the game outside of a couple of obvious graphical elements. I've been messing around with switches and gears and all the more complex stuff to get an idea of how stuff works.

So anyway, this brings me to my first actual level experiment, in what I hope to be the first of many many many more to come (other idea's include sailing into a uterus, actual moving positions, and then the obvious racial-based ideas).

NSFW, of course.

Slappywag Recording: Fergalicious Sing-A-Long; Random 3.0 musings & footage

no.spam@gameriot.com (magdain) — Sun, 19 Oct 2008 02:45:32 -0400
While BG / Arena's are down and the game is overall unplayable yet again, here's a little something to listen to and pass the time with:

http://files.filefront.com/fergalicious+feat+slappywgmp3/;12097528;/fileinfo.html

Ah yep, Slappywag is pretty much a professional singer (notice the multi-tracking at 3:07).

In other news, it's hard to tell how much of a failure 3.0 is so far considering I've only actually had one chance to play arena without constant lag streaks, random DCing and getting stuck on the loading screen for upwards of 10 hours.

It seems pretty ******* stupid though. As if the ESL tournament wasn't enough of an indication, have a look at this video filmed by Armagedon in capped resil:

http://files.filefront.com/30sucksmp4/;12086876;/fileinfo.html

Ah yep.

I'm genuinely surprised that no one at ESL ran double ret Paladin comps because I've actually been out mana'd by double ret Paladin in 2v2 before we could burst someone down. Seems like the players really haven't had much 3.0 live experience at all judging by the comps (although I think that Sham War RPaladin team had it right), which is understandable tbh.

Get your Hello Kitty Online beta keys while you can.

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Fri, 17 Oct 2008 01:56:49 -0400
http://www.fileplanet.com/promotions/hellokitty/

Get your beta invitation while you can!

For those of you who haven't been following Hello Kitty Online's developement, here's a little summary of the game:

"At last the amazing world of Hello Kitty and Friends is coming to interactive life as a massively multiplayer online game! SanrioDigital and Typhoon Games have combined Sanrio's much-loved characters with new eye-catching graphics and the engaging gameplay of MMORPGs. Gamers and fans finally have the opportunity to become a part of the Sanrio universe!"

For more information on this new WOW-killing MMO, head over to http://www.hellokittyonline.com/

Need music suggestions for my next PVP movie

no.spam@gameriot.com (Slappywag) — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 13:18:28 -0400
Planning on making a 3.0 video since I've had some ******* fantastic ideas of stuff that I want to put in it, and although I have a couple of potential songs in mind that might almost match up to the awesomeness level of the visual content, I figured I'd see if anyone could come up with anything better.

Why would you even bother helping me? Aren't you just some fat guy who writes mean blogs about people since you were bullied in high school? You didn't even get glad and you completely switched which perspective you were writing in when you started this paragraph. **** you.

But if your song(s) is [SONGS IS DOESN'T MAKE SENSE ****HEAD] picked you'll get your name ~in da movie~ at some point -- and not just on a long list of made up appearances or nerdout's (like shoutouts except for nerds).

ON WITH THE CONDITIONS.

There are 2 catagories of music I am thinking of using. Ideally I'd make room for both, i'm thinking the ol' 1 2 1 (start off with one music theme, completely switch it up, but then come back to something similar to the first theme to make teh listener feel safe).

Don't ******* suggest something really ******* generic and cliche. Go go power rangers eh eh eh **** UP. But if it's something that is funny and original it might get a spot. A good example of this is the Space Jam rap in Menismyforte's latest video. **** I love that guy.

POST YOUR SUGGESTION IN THE COMMENTS WITH A LINK TO IT ON YOUTUBE (or somewhere else where it can be played for free). If you just say the name and don't link YouTube I pretty much won't look for it unless I like you, and if I can't find it there Slapnuts will ban you.