Create an Account
Forgot your Password?
World of Warcraft
WowRiot
Starcraft 2
Starfeeder
Hellforge
Hellforge
 
Machinima
Myndflame
Left 4 Dead
Left 4 Dead
RazeTheWorld
RazeTheWorld
 
Quake Live
Quake Life
1337pwn
1337pwn
Limit Break
Limit Break
 
Resident Evil
Resident Evil Horror
Gameriot Store
Buy Games!
 
 
 
POST STUFF
close
New Blog Post
Add a Video
Host an Image
Upload a File
by Slapnuts, Level 70
Last updated at April 2, 2009, 6:45 am
Finally April Fools is over we can get back to regularly scheduled business.  Welcome to the Epic Drop, full of trolls, flames and pointing out that this isn't actually new news!  Whodathunk?  Enjoy!

This hit-and-run victim was found with an apology letter next to their body on the side of the road.  Apparently the letter noted that they were sorry and that the person had a family too and the police suspect it may have been a mother with a newborn baby.  Would this ease your grief at all?  Thinking it was an accident?  On either side of the equation?

Yep
Remember when Britney was way hot?  Those school-girl days?  It takes Photoshop now...=/
What does one sitting president get the Queen of EnglandAn iPod full of his own speeches and pictures of her and some "classic" songs.  Self absorbed much?  I bet she can't wait to get home, sit for some tea and crumpets and cuddle up by the fire to some Obama speeches!  I think it's time for a "Obama Speech Party" here at my house, forget Dazed&Confused-PBR night.

Stem cells to make breasts bigger
is now being offered in Britain.  The good news?  These boobehs will be less fake feeling as the stem cells help to grow natural tissue instead of cheap feeling implants.  Surely this will somehow trickle down to strip club prices someday.

Quint at AICN saw some new footage of G.I. Joe and wasn't impressed in the slightest.  This is unfortunate as I was hoping at least for an average summer popcorn flick.  I generally trust Quint's judgment so hopefully they held back some good footage?

A 62-yr-old man killed the 46-yr-old mother of his kids who had become hooked on Grand Theft Auto 4 on the Playstation 3.  And you guys say no one buys the PS3... pshhhh.  Video game addiction can surely be bad for you...

Remember that monster burger I showed you guys from the local minor league baseball team around here?  Well it seems "activists" (lol) are pissed that the team won't label it with a warning calling it a "dietary disaster that increases the risk of cancer and heart disease".  Are you ****ting me?  You don't even need to wonder about that just glancing at it out of the corner of your eye.

Oh ya, File Front is back... original owners as well, no more Ziff Davis b.s.!  Welcome back!


This guy is fast, really fast.  He certainly is full of himself but watch him in action.
     
79 comments
Borri
Borri Apr 2, 2009 at 6:54 am
None
None
+4 votes
None
eoreol
eoreol Apr 2, 2009 at 6:57 am
None
None
+1 votes
None
Vadaria
Vadaria Apr 2, 2009 at 10:56 am
None
None
+0 votes
None
eoreol said
Obama sucks at gifts.
I like the guy, but hes quickly giving himself the reputation of terrible gift giver. The relative you pray doesn't draw your name for christmas every year, lol.
 
Fett
Fett Apr 2, 2009 at 11:04 am
None
None
+3 votes
None
Well at least he isn't giving out Purple Crush and KFC coupons... =/
Vadaria
Vadaria Apr 2, 2009 at 11:30 am
None
None
+3 votes
None
Fett said
Well at least he isn't giving out Purple Crush and KFC coupons... =/
An iPod w/ your own speaches and a handfull of DVDs is probably the Head of State equivilent. 
 
oradol
oradol Apr 2, 2009 at 12:43 pm
None
None
+0 votes
None
If he gave something expensive he'd be criticized for wasting money.
Slapnuts
Slapnuts Apr 2, 2009 at 12:52 pm
None
None
+2 votes
None
Surely he could give something thoughtful and still be cheaper than an iPod and a bunch of music that was paid for.
Sleek
Sleek Apr 2, 2009 at 1:11 pm
None
None
+1 votes
None
You mean like dick-in-a-box?
oradol
oradol Apr 2, 2009 at 2:27 pm
None
None
+1 votes
None
Yeah it's a terrible gift. People would just find a way to ***** about it either way.
Smokeee
Smokeee Apr 2, 2009 at 4:00 pm
None
None
+0 votes
None
I thought she asked for an Ipod?
Saturnus
Saturnus Apr 2, 2009 at 5:04 pm
None
None
+0 votes
None
Smokeee
Smokeee Apr 3, 2009 at 10:51 am
None
None
+0 votes
None
Saturnus said
She already had one.
Well i heard on WTOP radio she requested an IPod.  Maybe Slapnuts is correct here that she had a Zune.  I don't really care.  Just saying what i heard on news radio.
Slapnuts
Slapnuts Apr 2, 2009 at 9:01 pm
None
None
+1 votes
None
She probably had a Zune, I'd hope the British are smart enough not to buy in to the Apple hype =p
simple11
simple11 Apr 3, 2009 at 1:04 am
None
None
+0 votes
None
Why is everyone bagging on Obama? It's the queen of England (yes she has an ipod already), but what doesn't she have. Shoot what would you get her thats any better.
Qlimax
Qlimax Apr 3, 2009 at 3:02 am
None
None
+2 votes
None
Something that actually has worth? Back in the day the president of America gifted some desk made from the timber of some famous naval vessel. And he has a matching desk too. Something like that.

The prime minister of Britain recently gave some fancy gift like the one I mentioned to Obama, and in return Obama gave him 25 American DVDs...

Obama is a stuck up, self righteous prick.
simple11
simple11 Apr 3, 2009 at 4:25 am
None
None
+0 votes
None
Obama is just apart of the younger generation. God forbid.
Smokeee
Smokeee Apr 3, 2009 at 10:58 am
None
None
+0 votes
None
What would you have bought her?  I'm truly curious.
Qlimax
Qlimax Apr 3, 2009 at 7:44 pm
None
None
+2 votes
None
Something unique and original. Not a ******* consumer product.
Saturnus
Saturnus Apr 2, 2009 at 6:59 am
None
None
+1 votes
None
Maybe they can use stem cells to increase dick size as well. That could get dangerous though. You know how us dudes are. We all want a giant sword bigger than the next guy. Pretty soon Victorias Secret will be making bras for our schlongs.
Slapnuts
Slapnuts Apr 2, 2009 at 7:05 am
None
None
+1 votes
None
Scary thought eh.  Instead of the "bro" from Seinfeld fame we would have "cockzire"
Kaex
Kaex Apr 2, 2009 at 10:12 am
None
None
+1 votes
None
I think the scarier thought is how Stem Cell research is being used to do **** like this instead of curing real problems.
uhhohh
uhhohh Apr 2, 2009 at 7:39 am
None
None
+1 votes
None
I don't think I could wear a penis grown in a petri dish.

I truly wonder how far people would go if they were to discover a cost effective way to increase dick size.
scamp
scamp Apr 2, 2009 at 7:04 am
None
None
+0 votes
None
They should post that handwritten "I'm sorry" letter.  Handwriting is very recognizable and all it takes is one person to tip the police.

And no, I doubt it would ease my grief.  It'd probably do the opposite as now you know that the person knew that they hit your family member and did nothing about it.
Knightemp
Knightemp Apr 2, 2009 at 7:12 am
None
None
+2 votes
None
One of the stories in that stem cell boobies site was about "orgasmic childbirth"... WHAT THE ****!?
Slapnuts
Slapnuts Apr 2, 2009 at 7:40 am
None
None
+1 votes
None
lol, i was reading that, some weird **** there.
Sleek
Sleek Apr 2, 2009 at 8:53 am
None
None
+0 votes
None
rofl ok I gotta go back and look
Sleek
Sleek Apr 2, 2009 at 1:47 pm
None
None
-1 votes
None
Yeah wow... I'm so uncomfortable right now reading about orgasmic childbirth.  I can not decide what to think about it. 
Erz
Erz Apr 2, 2009 at 7:25 am
None
None
+1 votes
None
It's just a gimmick and if you can't tell from looking at that burger that it's unhealthy then you're probably one hotdog eating competition away from killing yourself anyway.
Qlimax
Qlimax Apr 2, 2009 at 7:33 am
None
None
+1 votes
None
Obligatory reply for my buddy Slap:D

Go to the post office tomorrow you *****.
Levidian
Levidian Apr 2, 2009 at 8:23 am unhide comment
None
None
-7 votes
None
Slapnuts
Slapnuts Apr 2, 2009 at 8:52 am
None
None
+2 votes
None
Um, he did shoot the balloons, or did you not watch that far?
Levidian
Levidian Apr 2, 2009 at 9:04 am unhide comment
None
None
-6 votes
None
Vadaria
Vadaria Apr 2, 2009 at 11:00 am
None
None
+0 votes
None
Levidian said
I watched it w/o sound at work and skimmed a few parts. I watched him fire his gun at least 5-6 times and it was just shots of him pulling it out and putting it back in I guess I missed the shot of the balloons.
well if you watched it without sound, then you probably didn't realize that him pulling the gun in and out for the most part was either A) him just demonstrating how fast he can draw and holster, or B) a replay of him hitting the 2 baloons. Which hit did twice, hitting both and reholstering in just a fraction of a second. 

I saw this guy a few years back on some show, i forgot what it was though. Some big talent show of some sort.  
Godsmak
Godsmak Apr 2, 2009 at 12:26 pm
None
None
+5 votes
None
Levidian said
I watched it w/o sound at work and skimmed a few parts. I watched him fire his gun at least 5-6 times and it was just shots of him pulling it out and putting it back in I guess I missed the shot of the balloons.
You're such a dumb ****. If you skimmed parts and watched without sound then why do you make such a dumb comment?

You aren't good at anything Levidian, nothing, you are stuck in your mother's basement sitting on your carried rating hoping for Deadly Glad. WOOHOO HIGH FIVE!
Rioter
Rioter Apr 2, 2009 at 8:56 am
None
None
+2 votes
None
He was hitting two targets 8 feet away in a fraction of a second, not sure what you're on about.
wiggie
wiggie Apr 2, 2009 at 6:12 pm
None
None
+2 votes
None
"The use of blanks creates the illusion of accuracy while fast drawing, when in fact just aiming a gun loaded with a blank cartridge in the general direction of a balloon at close range will destroy the target where a live round would likely miss."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bob_Munden

Everything is a lie; Life sucks.
Sleek
Sleek Apr 2, 2009 at 8:44 am
None
None
+0 votes
None
This hit-and-run victim was found with an apology letter next to their body on the side of the road.

This probably isn't what happened, but that'd be a really good coverup idea if you were going to murder someone.  Have a girlfriend write an apology letter but not mention she's a girl.  The hand writing will obviously be a girl's handwriting and the police probably won't be suspicious of the subtle misdirection.
Levidian
Levidian Apr 2, 2009 at 9:05 am unhide comment
None
None
-6 votes
None
Sleek
Sleek Apr 2, 2009 at 9:06 am
None
None
+9 votes
None
Levidian
Levidian Apr 2, 2009 at 9:18 am unhide comment
None
None
-6 votes
None
Sleek
Sleek Apr 2, 2009 at 9:23 am
None
None
+0 votes
None
It was just a joke but I'm sure your gun would come into play if I wanted to surprise-murder you.  Life is pretty delicate.
Levidian
Levidian Apr 2, 2009 at 9:28 am
None
None
-4 votes
None
It's astonishing what the human body can go through and survive. Watch a few episodes of
I Survived
and you'll see what I'm talking about.

Anyway you surprise murdering me would be a ***** thing to do. If you want to fight to the death hand to hand some time let me know.
Sleek
Sleek Apr 2, 2009 at 9:32 am
None
None
+3 votes
None
This is why people don't like you man.  I just made a quick joke that didn't really need to be replied to.  You don't have to be a condescending tough guy when someone makes a joke, no one finds that likable.
Levidian
Levidian Apr 2, 2009 at 10:01 am unhide comment
None
None
-9 votes
None
Levidian
Levidian Apr 2, 2009 at 10:06 am unhide comment
None
None
-7 votes
None
Sleek
Sleek Apr 2, 2009 at 10:08 am
None
None
+1 votes
None
There's a subtle difference, but it's cool man forget about it.
Levidian
Levidian Apr 2, 2009 at 10:12 am
None
None
-4 votes
None
...and you post again (I know I did too) but you get the idea?
Sleek
Sleek Apr 2, 2009 at 10:15 am
None
None
+0 votes
None
Have you checked your inbox?
Munk
Munk Apr 2, 2009 at 11:06 am
None
None
+2 votes
None
Levidian said
...and you post again (I know I did too) but you get the idea?
You should learn to let things go. But since I know you can't, I'm looking forward to you're "witty" response.
Doomslice
Doomslice Apr 2, 2009 at 10:14 am
None
None
+1 votes
None
I had this typed out earlier after your hand-to-hand death match statement, but decided not to post it because it wasn't worth the effort to retrieve my password and log in.

But... "You are a giant douche."
Abdoom
Abdoom Apr 2, 2009 at 12:15 pm
None
None
+0 votes
None
Also you didn't need to respond to my obvious joke about having a lifetime license to carry (which I do but that doesn't matter).

The obvious joke that was not a joke?
Levidian
Levidian Apr 2, 2009 at 12:26 pm
None
None
-2 votes
None
Having a license to carry and actually carrying a weapon on your person are two different things.
Yiska
Yiska Apr 3, 2009 at 5:09 am
None
None
+1 votes
None
HEHEHHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHHE U MADE A FUNNEEEEHHH
Raiyn
Raiyn Apr 2, 2009 at 10:29 am
None
None
+2 votes
None
Should we receive those same warnings at McDonald's and Wendy's?

Why are they not protesting these places that contribute more to the deterioration of the American body than this massive burger ever will?
Slapnuts
Slapnuts Apr 2, 2009 at 10:40 am
None
None
+1 votes
None
I know, such a trivial thing to be pissed about.  It was on the news here as well, them activists.  Hell Mike and Mike in the Morning on ESPN were talking about the sandwich.  Apparently they feel "so much publicity" is going to encourage people to check it out or something.  Me, the more I see it the more disgusted I am.
Erz
Erz Apr 2, 2009 at 10:50 am
None
None
+1 votes
None
Even if people do check it out because of the publicity (and I'd tend to agree with you), people should be credited with the intelligence to realise that it's not a healthy option.
Vadaria
Vadaria Apr 2, 2009 at 11:03 am
None
None
+0 votes
None
Maybe tackle that thing w/ 8 other friends and a few beers, lol.

Might be a 2 night project.
 
Slapnuts
Slapnuts Apr 2, 2009 at 12:31 pm
None
None
+1 votes
None
Im curious to know if it actually tastes good.  If I could convince a couple of friends and we were sitting in a box there, or a clubhouse with actual tables (we do this once in a while), I'd almost split it just to try it.

Trying to split that up with a few buddies in the stands would be nearly impossible.
blog vitals
GameRiot's source for gaming news on the PC, console and portable front. Home of the Epic Drop!
203 Subscribers
Started December 20, 2007
1969 Total Entries
THE SPOTLIGHT
Arrested over tip, Hassan terrorist, Chuck, Avatar…
1 of 9
THE IMAGE FEED
226 images uploaded in the last 60 days. Got an image you need hosted?
Copyright ©2007-2009 GameRiot All Rights Reserved.