Taliban Remains A Threat...eh?

8 years later and we are still in Iraq. Plans to leave? Check. Public confirmation of such plans? Check. Political figures promising change? Check. Fun fact of the day? July 2009 was the deadliest month for American soldiers since we began our quest for nationwide obedience in 2001. But mothers take heart, fathers fear not, for these lives are going to a good cause. Let's just swipe all this under the rug, call it God's work, and be done with it, shall we?

Unfortunately, not everyone is a religion lobbyist. In fact, over the years more and more people have declared themselves as independent from any specific faith or religion. However, because it has become such a staple characteristic, to publicly announce your atheistic views would be political suicide, and rightfully so. We can't have some church stomping, science loving, communist running our country. We have to stick to our guns, honor our predecessors, and blast away anyone and anything that tries to tell us otherwise.

For example, here is what our military personal has to say about the current situation.

"It's a very aggressive enemy right now," McChrystal told the newspaper in the interview Saturday at his office in Kabul, Afghanistan. "We've got to stop their momentum, stop their initiative. It's hard work."

Yup, you heard him. The enemy is exceedingly aggressive right now. So aggressive, that they have begun fighting back when we paraded on into their country claiming we owned the place. So aggressive that they are firing back at our soldiers. We must stop them, at all costs. So aggressive that they are killing our innocent soldiers. INNOCENT. SOLDIERS. Thank God all of this is being done for a good cause. Now, if you could please just remind me what that cause was again....?

Oh, right, we never heard one.

Just so I'm clear, let's recap a couple things. We decide terrorism on America is that big of a threat. We conclude the country with the greatest chance of bombing our **** is Afghanastan. We spend millions of dollars to upgrade our already perfect war technology. We search every major camp we can, in hopes of finding lethal war technology - none is found. We continue fighting and searching, loosing soldiers, gaining nothing but continued support to fuel the progression of our military forces. More money spent, more soldiers dead. More land covered, nothing discovered. Now it's 2009, and we are loosing the most soliders we've ever lost to this "war" and yet we still find reasons to continue fighting. Why? Because they are the enemy, and they must be stopped. Like McCrystal said, " It's hard work."

Here's the irony. If any other country did what we are doing to Afghanastan, to us, World War III would commence. Why? Because we don't handle things very well. In fact, I'd call America the kid in your class you aren't quite sure about, because he always sits in the back with his hood up and his face in his gameboy. Wanna know what game we're playing? Grand Theft Auto for GameBoy Advanced, and according to Dr. Phil, Oprah, and a whole lot of suburban mom's, that means violence. That means if you are walking down the sidewalk, we're gonna run you over with a stolen car, use the body as leverage to gain control of the city, and then sell it all to a drug cartel for enough money to buy a plane for 1,300,000,00 dollars. Oh yeah, can't forget the clever name - B2 Spirit. I wonder which department came up with that one.

Unfortunately, we don't get to know a lot of the details. In fact, it's been confirmed that a lot of the details we do hear, aren't really details at all. They are cleverly written sentences by college graduate students who get paid 6 figure salaries to keep the country believing we are the good guys. And, as uneducated citizens, we hear the "facts" and watch the videos, and tell ourselves we are safe and sound here in the land of the free.

Well, kinda free. We have a freedom of religion, except being an athiest is socially unacceptable. We have freedom of speech, unless you are speaking your mind about politics or religion, in which case you are not free to speak. We force employers to be "equal opportunity employers" except we also have these guys called lawyers who know how to write sneaky little sentences that let places like Hooters hold high employment standards. We have a health care system. Does it work? Nope. The list goes on and on, we just seem to have perfected our ability to keep the public uninformed.

Timetable for leaving Iraq? At this rate, never.