A Hero's Journal #3: Winning In Wintergrasp

Winning in Wintergrasp means different things to different people.  For some, it's the difference between three Wintergrasp marks of honor and one.  For me, Winning in Wintergrasp is subjecting the alliance to the maximum amount of annoyance possible.

While in wintergrasp the other day, the regular whining started up.

"SHARE YOUR QUESTS!"

Ok.  So I decided to share my quests.  All of them.  Everything in my quest log.  Needless to say, my fellow alliance faction members were not amused.



On problem I came across was that many people had the same quests I did.  So I headed out to squidface palace to pick up some quests that most level 80's had not bothered with.



I found the perfect quest...named "Talk To The Hand" and headed back to Dalaran to await the next Lake Wintergrasp battle.

Once the battle started, I made use of my newfound quest...jamming the share button rapidly....over and over as if it were a mystical button that could cause pain to strangers over the internet.

Hilarity ensued when Lousoul asked the raid leader to kick me, only to find the raid leader was Sharlee, my old guildmate from Merciless.



After wintergrasp was over, I checked out MMO Champion to see what happened at blizzcon.  Except for the fact that a homosexual paladin with a lazy eye and gaybrows who ***** cats winning some tournament for a game that requires no skill, there wasn't any interesting news.  By in large, cataclysm looks like it will be failaclysm. 

One thing did jump out at me.

The horde...have taken over...SOUTHSHORE.

What a crock of **** that is.  First off, the Alliance always won Southshore vs Tauren Mill (or whatever) on every server.  Secondly, cataclysm would have been the perfect time to turn that little section of land into a World PvP battleground for old school players.

In the mood for some vengance, I headed out to southshore.

I made my way to the Yeti cave and harassed some poor lowbie warlock for awhile.




After that I went to Tauren Mill (**** you, that is what I call it) and ran through some lowbies.



 
After killing everyone (including NPC's) in all the huts, and the flight master I start getting messages like crazy from illiterate kids in the guild "solidarity" about some warlock I killed two or three times named Patianna.



I mostly ignored them.  What am I, some kind of virtual hitman for retards?  Yet, the whipers kept pouring in. 



I left Tauren Mill to continue my crusade to avenge Southshore elsewhere in the zone.



After riding around for awhile, I headed over to Hillsbrad fields where the whordlings often quest.  Sure enough I came across Patianna again.  This time I decided to just kill his pet  (he's a lock) and have the mobs kill him so he'd get the repair cost.  



Each time after killing Patianna I'd ride away like I was going somewhere else and then kill him again.  I must have killed him three or four times when I started getting tells from his friends again saying "LEAVE HIM ALONE!".

The funny part is they wanted me to kill their friend "once" like I'm their personal ******* virtual army to command around.   The lowbie horde warlock signed on to his Alliance deathknight main and sent me some tears via whisper:



It was almost time for another Wintergrasp, so I hearthed back to Dalaran and did some finger stretches to get my index finger prepared to push the "Share Quest" button 500 times in a half an hour.

The Alliance was a lot less amused with my generous sharing of quests this time around.



Quite shockingly they kicked me from the raid group!  How dare they...I'm the Hero of Dethecus!

So I thought to myself "Vir, how can you screw up their game if you aren't in the raid?"

and then the answer came to me:

Catapults.  I would build Catapults.  Lots of Catapults...and hide them where ever I could so the alliance couldn't make seige engines or destroyers!



I hid them on each side of the building:



Eventually the Alliance caught on, mostly because I was telling them to enjoy their catapults in general chat.   I took to hiding the Catapults in back of the shop.






Eventually, all of my catapult construction paid off, and the Alliance lost Lake Wintergrasp.  I may have 2 less Wintergrasp Marks of Honor, but I enhanced my gameplay experence.



Dalaran was a lot of fun after the match as well!



Until next time, enjoy your "Share Quest" button!