A Dedication to the Trolls of Gameriot

While many readers of the GR community are absolutely appalled at the number of trolls that have found their way onto the website recently (due to them often trashing decent blogs or hurting feelings) it's easy to see that they also provide some of the best entertainment that can be found on the website, period. Some of the most hilarious content I've read on GR has to be when two reputable trolls go head to head, or one specific troll just becomes so goddamn good at what they do that it becomes entirely unimaginable as to how they actually do it so well (Lusitania comes to mind here) Today I salute the trolls of Gameriot for making mine, and many others reading experience that much better.

Note: This is a short, compressed list - there are many other notable trolls of Gameriot, but these are those who have left the biggest impression on my mind.

The Good

Lusitania - I figured that I would list this guy first, as he is probably the definition of the one troll who is so amazingly good that it's simply unbelievable - or perhaps downright sick. The Troll of no words, Lusitania is probably the finest troll that Gameriot has to offer. You would imagine that at the speed he responds to any and every post by Factionz (and now Slappywag) with a picture reference of a happily clad Pizza Delivery Boy that the guy has to be sitting at the computer constantly or has developed a program that will some how alarm him to every post Faction ever makes. Regardless of how he does it, even those he trolls can appreciate the art that is his work. Brilliant is an understatement at best.

Vir - Now I wouldn't go as far as to say that Vir is actually a 100% definable troll, but the way in which he can utterly destroy the worst of trolls is absolutely worth mentioning (he also is quite good at designing his articles to generate good traffic with small things such as misleading titles which could easily be considered trolling- while at the same time they're almost all good reads).

Any and every ignorant fool who has in any way tried to take down the mighty Vir has met the wrath of the anti-troll god. A perfect example would be the ever pathetic 'Tehjerk'. You might recall the small battle that these two had months back

Tehjerk made the mistake of calling out Vir in a disgustingly pathetic blog post, which was deleted. Reading this, Vir then rebutted with his own tehjerk bashing in which tehjerk was absolutely destroyed by the entirety of the gameriot community based somewhat off of thejerk's post in which he attempted to enlighten gameriot as to how to make money working for mommy and daddy's auto shop.

After admitting to "trolling" on a 486, and the fact that he is a 34 year old receptionist working at his parents autobody shop was outed on gameriot, tehjerk has seemingly fallen off of the face of earth or possibly just gone back to where he belongs - behind a desk where god is nice enough to limit his access via a 486 and Dialup.

In the end, Vir is a force to be reckoned with in the trolling community, and don't even think about talking politics unless you know exactly what you're talking about as well. It would just be dishonorable to not mention the man responsible for removing tehjerk from gameriot.

Ming - Ming has often been considered the best troll to ever hit Gameriot. With his constant Naruto, Basketball, and Chakra references of the past, in combination with his ridiculously pro-China/anti-America/Olympics propaganda that has made hairs stand up on the necks of every reader, he has arguably taken the "troll" to the next level - something that goes beyond keyboard camping and can actually generate real life profit. The best part about it is that no matter how ridiculous the trolls get, the entire community can't help but to tell him just that - often writing 3-10 comments in the process which further increases his troll level. Ming is without a doubt, a troll of the new generation.

SlappyWag - I was relatively torn on whether or not to put Slappy in 'The Good' or 'The Decent' until he accomplished his 200+ comment troll with fake pictures that even had me going based on a brief skim of the article. There's no doubt about the fact that he belongs here now. Plus, when you get comments like these, who will argue at your level of trollism:

"Slappywag, I hope that one day when you are swimming for recreation in the Pacific Ocean there is an oil spill and the oil starts surrounding you and then it lights on fire and you have to choose between burning alive or drowning."

Slappywag is also the one and only originator of "YM" rages on Gameriot (or at least used it to death), and this is self-explanatory in itself as to why he deserves a spot on list.

I think the top contenders are Ming, SW, and Lusitania, but if you have another suggestion, feel free to leave it.





The Decent

Factionz - What list isn't complete without Factionz. This guy is the epitome of the troll that is incredibly good at telling people how ******* terrible they are at the game that both Faction and the person both play. If you are bad, or even make a mistake and Factionz happens to be in the same game at the same time, know that not only will you be brutally ridiculed, but every single person on earth will know of your failure. Screenshots of your ****tiness will be exposed, and you will forever be remembered based on said screenshot.

A perfect case in point would be the poor mage, Exitec, who happened to somehow do a astonishingly low 1063 damage in a 2 minute game against Faction.

The Famous S/S

Faction followed that up with an entire blog post dedicated to how bad Exitec was.

If you are terrible, Factionz will know about it, and so will everyone else.

SK-Neilyo (fake)- This guy, to my knowledge, was the first of his kind and that is exactly why he makes this list. On average, at least a dozen of his posts each week are taken seriously by the idiots running rampant on this website who somehow, as if people couldn't get any dumber, assume he is the one and only Neilyo of SK-Gaming. He precedes even that one guy trying to pretend he is  hydra of Nihilum(terrible, terrible troll), so he at least deserves some credit.

Godsmak/NZGS - I would consider both of these guys to be of your more, 'intelligent' trolls.  Both Godsmak and NZGS, while relatively good trolls, do it without the use of YM's, random face slamming of the keyboard, and actually uses decent, coherent sentences in all of their trolling duties. Both simply good at what they do, while still adding some substance to GR here and there as well.

Betterthanyou - Right up there with Slappywag, Betterthanyou is another originator of a catch phrase on gameriot. Coining (or at least using it to death) the term KID in all it's glory, I couldn't even begin to count the number of times some poor sap has gotten in an arguement and due to being so frustrated, resorted to calling BTY a 'kid' in return, further embarrassing themselves in the process.

BTY is also known for spamming the front page of Gameriot during the blogging contest with direct plagiarized content from other websites.

Jiggle-Billy, AKA Klynx - Recently pulled quite a fast one on the gameriot community after revealing that the relatively well-known Troll, Jiggle-Billy, was actually him using another username besides his main, Klynx. Other than that, a pretty decent troll.

The Bad

While there are definitely many more than listed, the following names are those that are so bad that they are absolutely worth noting.

tehjerk - This one is pretty self-explanatory. After making it blatantly obvious that, as a child, tehjerk was surely to have inhaled far too much exhaust fumes in his fathers body shop, tehjerk is your run of the mill idiot that seems to have fallen down the path of the troll simply because he is too ******* stupid to do anything else. Hellbent on trying to find some sort of redemption based on an unbelievable amount of self-loathing patheticness, tehjerk managed to spam almost every post with completely incoherent blabble that even trolls were tired of reading. Thankfully, Vir did us all a favor in removing this idiot from the Gameriot, and hopefully the internet itself.

Yiska- If I could put money on it and win some sort of prize, I would swear that this guy and tokesh are brothers - and downy brothers at that. This guy is so horrible at what he does, he makes every troll on the internet look that much worse.

thankfully, I can let his comments do the talking:

Maybe I could mow the lawn of ym. oh wait, been there dun that.

This is insulting. Trying to troll the trollgod is against the trollcaste rules

In response to a previous commenter typing "O", Yiska had this to say:

-ral penetration

The So ******* Bad I had to Make Another Section Just For Them

Tokesh - Do I even really need to say anything? This guy is almost worse than tehjerk. I would swear that every time this guy responds to something, he just smashes his assumingly fat-**** face into the keyboard over and over again because he has a higher chance of actually posting something half way ******* coherent this way as opposed to using his hands.

The epitome of "guy who tries way too hard at trolling", Tokesh is ridiculed and insulted by every single reader on Gameriot, and I would be hard pressed to find someone that wouldn't suggest that Tokesh should kill himself and do us all a favor. I believe this guy holds the uncontested award for the highest downvoted comments on the website.

And if that wasn't enough, Tokesh has now taken it to a new level by portraying his unbelievably amazing skills at rapping in every comment, but with a birth date of January 28, 1994, I guess it's hard to expect anything better.

I decided to provide a poll, just so he might get it: