I'M AWSUM

As I watched Transformers 2 this weekend I couldn't help but notice that the American and British special forces in the movie were trying to kill 30+ foot robots with M16s that fire 5.56mm rounds... That's like trying to kill an elephant with a BB gun.



For those of you who aren't familiar with the Transformer story, it's basically about two rivial political factions from a species of giant advanced robots fighting over control of their home planet called Cybertron. The Decepticons ended up winning control of Cybertron and the Autobots and their leader, Optimus Prime, were forced to flee in order to regroup and in doing so stumbled upon a planet called Earth. But the Decepticons weren't happy with just sitting around on Cybertron waiting for the Autobots to return. So Megatron and his Decepticons decided to hunt the Autobots down across the galaxy. It's basically just like how the liberals purged the conservatives out of every news agency and college campus and are now trying to destroy their home planet of FOX News...


"NO CONSERVATIVE DISSENT WILL BE TOLERATED. DESTROY."

Let's take a look at some of the possible hardware the humans should be using to fight the Decepticons in Transformers 3:

-PMP Neopup PAW



The PMP Neopup PAW (Personal Assault Weapon) is made by the funky and creative South Africans who were forced to develope their own weapons due to the embargos during apartheid (there's still apatheid in South Africa today but it's directed at white people so noone seems to care...) in order to defend themselves. It's a semi-automatic grenade launcher that fires a very cool grenade round which has an extremely flat trajectory unlike most grenade rounds which allows it to be pretty much fired like a normal rifle hundreds of yards out. I don't care if you're a giant robot or a human, this gun will definitely do some serious damage. Especially if you aim for the vitals like the head and body.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=893y5mJe6KU&feature=channel_page 

-Milkor MGL



Wielded by the U.S. Marines, the Milkor MGL is another South African created semi-automatic grenade launcher that has already been proven to be a very effective weapon on the battlefield. Since it fires a grenade round twice as large as the round fired by the PMP Neopup PAW it does even more damage. So it's like having a handheld piece of artillery. Ouch.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OVfhTqL95jY 

-Denel NTW-20

 

An anti-robot sniper rifle if there ever was one. Put thousands of these into the hands of the humans and load them up with some massive armor piercing and high explosive rounds and you'll have the Decpticons ****ting bricks.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vXLRYf9EV2Y 

-Metal Storm MAUL



Screw the dinky handguns the soldiers in Transformers 2 looked to be carrying. If you want to have an acceptable sidearm and backup weapon for taking out Decepticons you're gonna need this very creative pistol-like shotgun. It holds 5 rounds within the barrel which can all be fired at once or one at a time with virtually zero recoil. Put some explosive grenade shells in it and you're good to go.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8HurZ1dlPJk 

-RPG 7



The good ol' RPG 7. Designed by the Soviets several decades ago it's dirt cheap and easy to use. It's capable of firing all kinds of rounds from armor piercing to thermobaric. And unlike in most video games the RPG is almost bullet fast and pretty accurate. Perfect for taking out gigantic robots.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=98CM71ngYYI  

Just make sure you're careful when you aim...

so much energy... wasted...

You'll be thanking me one day when we really are invaded by a race of advanced alien robots.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TcKpx2DxGwY&feature=haxa_popt00us06 

And we're gonna need some heavy firepower when those things hatch as well.

If they are able to travel through space they are able to control so much energy that we cannot stand a chance anyway. Conclusion? **** socialist's "zero growth, share benefits" ideas.

This is actually one of the things that really did bother me about this film because it's a step back from the first!

In the first the soldiers in the street scenes are mostly carrying grenade launchers and they mention getting sabot rounds for them at some point. And I thought okie-dokie, when they make the special task force FOR HUNTING EBIL ROBOTS they must surely carry on using those. Instead they revert to using pants guns!

In conclusion; I agree with korgath. Also I liked the railgun, PEW

Speaking of rail guns... check these suckers out:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4OqlTXwLG40 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dRjnY261upo 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TXECU3YKMfI 

Should work really good for ******* up the commi Chinese in the decades to come.

What kind of kick back does that Milkor MGL have?

I've never fired one but it seems to be pretty managable.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gdbMpLHE8ww 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_KZwJNOR19U 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MlFlXMHaSVQ 

^Uber recoil.